Real Peace Is Knowing I Don't Have To Deal With Anything That I Don't Want To Deal With

Life can be overwhelming. With work, relationships, family, and everything else, it can often feel like there’s too much on our plates, and no room to breathe. We’re constantly juggling responsibilities, trying to keep everything afloat, and the weight of it all can be suffocating. And let’s be honest, in this day and age, there probably is too much. We live in a fast-paced world that demands more of us than ever before—more productivity, more engagement, more energy—and it's easy to get caught up in the whirlwind of trying to meet these endless demands.

Recently, I have felt these feelings all too well. I’ve personally struggled with trying to take on too much, all at once, thinking that if I just worked harder, pushed myself a little further, I could manage it all. I’ve tried to be everything to everyone—to my colleagues, my friends, my family—trying to fulfill every role perfectly. And in the process, I found myself constantly exhausted, drained, and unable to meet the expectations I had set for myself. I’ve tried to “keep up with the Joneses,” comparing myself to others and feeling like I needed to do the same things, achieve the same milestones, and maintain the same pace, just to prove that I was keeping up. But in the end, it wasn’t sustainable. I ignored my own limits, and it caught up with me—mentally, emotionally, and even physically.

But here’s the thing: we have more agency than we think. We often believe we have to do all these things, that we’re bound by some invisible force pushing us to keep going even when we’re running on empty. But who’s really making us do all this stuff? Is it society? Expectations? Or are we placing those pressures on ourselves? It’s easy to fall into the trap of thinking we have no choice, that we’re obligated to say yes to everything, to take on every task that comes our way, and to meet every external expectation. But that’s not entirely true.

The next time you find yourself about to dive into a task, a responsibility, or a situation that feels overwhelming, stop for a moment and ask yourself: Do I really need to do this? Is this something that’s truly necessary for my growth, happiness, or well-being? Or am I just doing it because I feel obligated, or because I’m trying to meet someone else’s expectations? We have to take a step back and reassess. So much of what we do is driven by external pressures—what society tells us is important, what we think will make others happy or keep us in their good graces. But are those the right reasons?

It’s time to question whether we’re living our lives for ourselves or for others. When we start asking these questions, we reclaim control over our time, our energy, and our decisions. We realize that we don’t have to do everything. We don’t have to be everything to everyone. We have the power to say no, to set boundaries, and to focus on what truly matters. And when we do, we give ourselves the space to breathe, to focus on what brings us joy and fulfillment, and to lead healthier, more balanced lives.

So, think about it. The next time you’re about to take on another commitment or another task, ask yourself: Am I doing this for me? Or am I just doing it to check a box, meet an expectation, or please others? It’s a simple question, but it can make all the difference in how we approach our lives.